ICE CREAM MAN

First of all, the film falls into the typical Hollywood horror trap of having little to no storyline. There's an excuse for the Ice Cream Man's motivation, but it's flimsy at best. It doesn't flesh out much of the film, instead relying heavily on extreme gore (in Australia, the film has an R18+ rating) to get us through the 86-minute run time. Other parts of Roth's screenplay are monumentally lopsided; we have an incredibly forced dinner scene with Jared, Lizzie and their parents which runs well over 10 per cent of the film and screams of setting up future plot points.

So between the lack of storyline, the unwieldy script and the violent horror elements trying to make up for these other failings, the audience is left with very little - besides the odd chuckle. The younger cast don't offer a lot in terms of depth or range, and they stumble from forgettable set piece to set piece. We're forced to endure gaps in logic, unrealistic character behaviour, and timeline disparities. In addition to this, you have one character whose bulimia is treated as a superpower against the consumption of the ice cream; a far from ideal message to be portraying with the ever-growing body image issues only amplified in recent years by social media.

At the moment, Eli Roth is being roasted on social media for his use of generative AI within the film, after initially saying that it didn't utilise any. It's yet another issue facing this controversial production, and while it will not have a bearing on many (especially U.S.) horror filmgoers or how they perceive the final product, it's a reality that needs to be faced. We take away creativity from workers on films like this - jobs in an industry that is already struggling and facing major economic and logistical challenges - and we risk having bland, soulless productions created by less than a handful of people rather than a skilled team, each of whom offers input that improves the end result. A move like this not only threatens movies in cinemas, but what we watch on TV, on streaming, on Netflix, and challenges the exciting, funny, romantic, terrifying, incomparable world of entertainment we know and love today.

With the release of true cinematic gems like 'Obsession' and 'Backrooms' this year, haven't we had enough horror tripe like 'Ice Cream Man'? Isn't it time we demanded more from our cinema-going experience? We have the power to vote with our wallets, and there are so many 2026 films worthy of our hard-earned cash. 'Ice Cream Man' is far from one of them. Don't let this brain rot give you brain freeze. Find something a little more satiating to terrify you for your time and money.